Kirby's Insane Journey to Find the Two Amulets!

[ClaudeLv250]

Wow...its probably been a year since I put this story on hold and didn't update. I always planned on continuing it, but I never got around to it...I stopped writing altogether for awhile, and when I started back up, I brought my attention to other stories (such as New Testaments: Secret of Mana). So why am I putting KIJ3 back up? Simply because I finally updated it with Chapter 6! *much rejoicing*

But before I put the rest of this story up, the KIJ1 and 2 are still around. They're archived on Fanfiction.net:

Kirby's Insane Journey to Learn how to Wall Jump!

Kirby's Insane Journey to Learn how to Wall Jump...Again!

This same story can also be found here

And now, I present the return of my long running Kirby's Insane Journey fanfiction series and their incredibly long title names!

Kirby’s Insane Journey to Find the Forbidden Amulets of Light and Darkness
By ClaudeLv250

Disclaimer: First of all, to make sure that Nintendo doesn’t sue me penniless, I do not own the Super Smash Brothers. That is the property of Nintendo, but I bet you already knew that. The characters I created are my property so ASK BEFORE YOU USE! I’d appreciate it.


Chapter 1: The Forbidden Amulets

*It has been a little over a month since Kirby had gone on his insane journey to get his wall jump back from the clutches of Lakitu and saved the Super Smash Brothers Melee tournament from the disaster of being too strict with rules. All was quiet in the Nintendo Universe…but Ness’ house had been particularly active today. Ness had won the newest computer released in a contest. It had arrived today and Jeff had offered to help set the computer up and figure out the functions that made it the most advanced PC at the time. That was 5 hours ago. Jeff had already gotten the Internet connection established and decided to do a little surfing on the net. Tracy, Ness’ little sister, had already annoyed Jeff for 30 minutes straight about advertising Escargo Express on the net until he finally agreed with helping her advertise it. Once everyone had fallen asleep, Jeff began to continue with his initial intentions: to hack HAL Laboratories’ website. After a little bit of hacking (like I’m going to go into detail and tell you people how to hack HAL. HAH) he found his way into a vault of secret documents. There were so many and they were all eye catchers, so he picked a random document. This document just happened to be about the “Forbidden Amulets”. Jeff had waken Ness up and read it…

“Forbidden Amulets:

Two amulets, the Amulet of Light, and the Amulet of Darkness, were created for Super Smash Brothers Melee. These items would upgrade the bearer into a stronger, more formidable being. The Light Amulet was for Heroes and the Dark Amulet was for Villains. If a Hero were to pick up a Dark Amulet or vise versa, side effects would occur. The actual Amulets were too powerful and duplicates of the amulets were created for use in a Smash Brothers tournament. These duplicates were tested and it became apparent that the original Amulets could not be duplicated correctly. All duplicates were destroyed but one was preserved. It is used to transform Bowser into Giga Bowser. The original Amulets of Light and Darkness were sealed in the Nintendo Universe.

Light: Hyrule

Dark: Zebes”

Jeff: Only a genius with my skills could have stumbled upon a discovering like this!

Ness: I can’t believe you hacked the site!

Jeff: I think your friends, the armored woman and the silent swordsman, and the rest of those crazy people might like to know about this information.

Ness: I’ll…tell them tomorrow.

Computer: INTRUDER ALERT!

Ness: AH!

Jeff: Close the site, now!

*Ness quickly closed the site.*

Jeff: I need a well-deserved rest.

Ness: Are you crazy!? What if they trace the connection to here?! They will think I hacked them and I will be a disgrace to the Nintendo Universe!

Jeff: If you find those amulets you may become the most respected Nintendo mascot. Maybe even bigger than Mario!

Ness: Hmm…

Jeff: I am getting the rest I deserve. See you in the morning.

*Jeff had walked out of the room and Tracy entered stealthily. Before Ness could close out his Internet connection, a popup had appeared. This was his first time on the Internet and he already hated popup ads. The popup was an ad for a porn site and it caught Ness off guard. Tracy was staring over her brother’s shoulder.*

Ness: Ack!

Tracy: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! NESS IS LOOKING AT POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNN! !!

Mother: NEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

*****
The Next Day

*Zelda was frantically running through Hyrule Castle, fixing everything that looked like it needed fixing. She wanted to impress her two guests that were on their way. Today was the day that the two swordsmen, Marth and Roy, were going to be introduced to the other Nintendo mascots. They weren’t the only ones that were being introduced, Young Link, the younger version of Link, had became a citizen of Hyrule only a few days ago. Young Link wasn’t as well behaved as his older self. He was a rambunctious child that caused trouble on a daily basis.*

Zelda: Link! Link?! Where are you?

*Zelda found Link grabbing his younger self from climbing up some curtains, who was trying to reach the boomerang he was carelessly throwing around the castle.*

Zelda: Young Link! You have to behave yourself! We don’t want our guests to think that you have no home training.

Y.Link: Home training sucks!

Zelda: I bet you don’t even know what that is!

Y.Link: I don’t really care, either.

Zelda: …I hear a horse. They are here! Hurry!

*Zelda and Link ran into the Castle Courtyard. Young Link had slowly walked into the courtyard slowly, as if he could care less about the arriving guests. Two horses were approaching them…*


Chapter 2: The Swordsmen

*The horses stopped infront of Zelda and Link. The swordsman and Prince known as Marth gracefully climbed down from his horse and approached Zelda. He kissed her hand and leaned forward in the process.*

Marth: I am Prince Marth of Altea.

*Roy hopped off of his horse without much care and rolled his eyes at Marth’s actions. He then buffed his chest out, and laid one hand on the sheath of his sword.*

Roy: I’m Roy, the best swordsman in all of Nintendo!

*Link raised a brow in question to Roy’s statement. A smile appeared on Young Link’s face as the thought of challenging Roy to a fight struck his mind.*

Zelda: I am Princess Zelda. This is Link and Young Link. It pleasures me to have you two visit the castle. Some friends of mine will be arriving soon, to meet you. Come inside while we wait for them.

*After Marth and Roy secured their horses, they followed Zelda into the castle. After a bit of chatting, Marth and Zelda realized that they both loved to play chess. They began playing a game together, while Roy sat down in a chair, bored out of his mind. Link and Young Link were nowhere to be found. After what seemed like forever to Roy, the game of Chess was almost over. Zelda was about to make her finishing move on Marth, when a green blur dashed across the room and knocked the chessboard across the room. Marth sighed as the game could not be continued.*

Zelda: YOUNG LINK!!!

*Link jogged around the corner, panting. He couldn’t keep up with his younger self. A priceless vase fell and smashed to pieces by the work of Young Link’s boomerang. Before Zelda could react to that, a crash erupted from the courtyard. Everyone ran out to see what it was, even the curious Young Link. A newborn, smoking crater sat in the middle of the courtyard. Marth unsheathed his sword and cautiously approached the crater. Roy unsheathed his sword and moved ahead of Marth, to show off. A charred Kirby crawled out of the crater.*

Zelda: Kirby! What happened?! Who did this to you?!

Kirby: Er…um…my warp star crashed. *Sweatdrop*

Y.Link: What IS that thing?

Roy: That’s what I want to know.

Marth: It is not polite to refer to strangers as “things”.

Kirby: Yeah, I’m not a thing!

Roy: Are you sure about that?

Kirby: I’M NOT A THING!

Zelda: Before any arguments break out, I have to introduce you all. Kirby, these are the characters in the game, Young Link, Prince Marth, and Roy.

Kirby: Hi!

Marth: Pleasure to meet you.

Roy: It pleasures YOU to meet me!

Y.Link: Yeah, hi, whatever.

Marth: Kirby, you are lucky to have a friend such as Princess Zelda. She is excellent at a game of chess.

Zelda: Marth… *giggle*

Roy: < Sickening…I could do better. > *Ahem* Princess Zelda, has anyone told you how beautiful you are? I almost fell off of my horse when I first saw you!

Zelda: Roy… *giggle*

Link: …!

Y.Link: Hey, cool! A spaceship!

*Young Link pointed at an object flying through the air. It landed in the courtyard and the two occupants, Samus and Yoshi, climbed out.*

Roy: …a dinosaur and a metal person? *Scratches head*

Samus: Before you go assuming anything, I am a woman.

Yoshi: So these are the new characters?

Y.Link: What’s it to ya?

Yoshi: The kid has attitude…well let’s get things established. I rock like no other in the Nintendo Universe. Don’t try to rock as hard as me. It’s impossible.

Roy: And you are…?

Yoshi: HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHO I AM!?

Marth: Please, calm down. If you would introduce yourself-

Yoshi: Hm…since I rock so hard…the actual process of remembering a creature that rocks as hard as I do may have caused brain damage and you forgot in order to not cause pain to yourselves.

Roy: Sure… < Weirdo. > Well anyways, I’m Roy.

Marth: You may insist on the thought of already knowing you. I have never met you before. I am Prince Marth. Pleasure to mee-

Yoshi: You have a tiara on your head.

Marth: Yes, I do.

Yoshi: You look like Sailor Moon!

Marth: I resent that.

Yoshi: Where’s the talking cat, Sailor Moon?

Marth: Sailor Moon is a teenage girl from an anime! I am not!

Zelda: Yoshi, stop teasing Marth.

Marth: Hm…Yoshi…what an odd name.

Yoshi: Hm…Marth…what an ODD name for a sailor scout!

Marth: (whispering to Zelda) I believe that your friend does not like me very much.

Zelda: (whispering to Marth) He teases everyone once in awhile. It makes him feel better about himself.

Yoshi: I heard that!

Kirby: Samus, where is Captain Falcon?

Samus: He should be here soon. He wanted to show off the Blue Falcon… *ahem* the Bluer Falcon.

*Only seconds after Samus finished her sentence, a vehicle resembling the Blue Falcon sped into the courtyard and parked beside the crater. Captain Falcon climbed out of his vehicle and tripped into the crater. He climbed out of the crater and brushed himself off, then proceeded to wave to everyone.*

C.Falcon: Hi everyone!

Zelda: Hell Falcon!

Yoshi: …THAT is the Bluer Falcon?

C.Falcon: Yes, isn’t it beautiful?

Yoshi: The only thing you did to it was give it a new paint job?!

C.Falcon: Yup! Painted it green just like the Gamecube’s defeat color!

Yoshi: Falcon, you idiot! It’s DEFAULT, not defeat! And the Gamecube’s default color is Indigo!

C.Falcon: So it is…and I’m not an idiot!

Marth: Do not insult this man’s intelligence without a good reason!

Yoshi: He painted his car GREEN, thought that it was the Gamecube’s default, or known as DEFEAT color to him. And had the nerve to rename his car to BLUER Falcon! Are you telling me that that is not a good reason to call him an idiot!?

Marth: …you are right.

Yoshi: See, even Sailor Moon agrees with me!

Marth: Please stop calling me that.

Zelda: I see that everyone is starting to get active. I’ll go get- Young Link! Leave that alone!

*Young Link slammed the door shut and started up Captain Falcon’s car. Within seconds he had taken off and left the courtyard with Captain Falcon running after him.*

C.Falcon: Hijacker!

Samus: The child is like a demon from hell?

Zelda: *sigh* No, he IS hell. It’s hard to believe that that is what Link was like when he was young.

Link: …!

Zelda: No offense! Like I was saying earlier, I’ll go get some food for everyone.

Marth: Let me assist you-

Roy: No, let ME help you! I have more muscle than Marth!

Zelda: No, I don’t really need any help. Thank you anyway. *Walks into the castle*

Yoshi: Hmm…

Marth: Roy, why must you try to out perform me when I speak to Zelda?

Roy: Mainly because I know that you don’t fool with women. I do, however.

Yoshi: Erk?

*After eavesdropping on Marth and Roy’s conversation, Yoshi enters the castle and finds Zelda heading back to the courtyard with a tray of well prepared sandwiches.*

Zelda: Yoshi, are you here to annoy me?

Yoshi: Hey…those sandwiches look like the ones you see on Subway commercials…but when you get the actual sandwich, it looks like dirt compared to the one on the commercial.

Zelda: Is there any reason why you are here?

Yoshi: Ah…yes…I wanted to know what you thought about the two swordsmen.

Zelda: Roy…is a nice guy and all but a little too aggressive at times and seems to always look for a competition.

Yoshi: And Sailor Moon?

Zelda: MARTH is…

Yoshi: Is…your knight in shining armor? I saw the way you were staring at him. You want him and you want him now!

Zelda: Yes! I want him! He is polite, thoughtful, handsome, and we have so many things in common!

Yoshi: I knew it!

Zelda: Tell anyone what I said and I will shove my foot so far down your throat that you won’t be able to talk again!

Yoshi: Okay! I’m not going to tell anyone! I just thought that you should know…

Zelda: Know what?

Yoshi: Know that he is gay!

Zelda: YOU’RE LYING!

Yoshi: I heard him and Roy talking! He doesn’t fool with women!

Zelda: You do nothing but spread rumors about people!

Yoshi: The man wears a damn tiara on his head!

Zelda: …

Yoshi: Zelda?

*Zelda walked out of the castle in silence with Yoshi following her. She set the tray of sandwiches on Kirby’s head as if he were a table, and pulled Marth from the crowd. Yoshi stood in hearing distance.*

Zelda: Marth, I have to ask you a question.

Marth: Yes, princess?

Zelda: …Areyougay?

Marth: What?

Zelda: ARE YOU GAY?!

Everyone: *gasp*

Yoshi: That’s right! Marth is gay!

Marth: Where would you get a ridiculous idea like that?!

Zelda: Well, you don’t fool with women!

Marth: I do not fool with women because I am married to my wife, Seeda! She gets jealous when I speak to another woman. If I were to fool around with one, I would not know what to expect from her! I am loyal to her and she is loyal to me!

Everyone: *sigh*

Roy: She threw a knife at him before.

Everyone: *gasp*

Zelda: Marth, I’m sorry. I let rumors get the best of me *evil glare at Yoshi*. If you would excuse me, I will deal with the source of these rumors right now. *Drags Yoshi into the castle*

Yoshi: How about that about that. He’s straight and married!

Zelda: I am soooo pissed at you! You made me look like a fool!

Yoshi: Hey…atleast one good thing came out of this. You know he’s married so you won’t throw yourself on him like some desperate whore. And because I made a mistake…I’ll wipe that revenge remark I made awhile back off of your slate. *Innocent smile*

Zelda: That’s not enough!

Yoshi: Huh…what are you doing?!

*Punch*

*Yoshi emerged from the castle with a black eye. Many eyes had locked on to him but pretty much figured out what had happened. Zelda entered the courtyard once again, and removed the tray of sandwiches from Kirby’s head.*

Zelda: I’ve got sandwiches, if anyone is hun-

*A stampede nearly knocked Zelda off of her feet. The sandwiches were gone instantly. A small ringing was heard, and Zelda pulled out a phone from a pocket in her dress.*

Kirby: You have a cellular phone?!

Zelda: A woman has to keep up with technology. *Click* Hello?

Ness: Zelda! I’ve found out some important news! I think that everyone would be interested in this news.

Zelda: There are quite a few people at my castle right now. Come over and tell everyone.

Ness: I’ll be there in a few minutes! *Click*

Samus: Who was it?

Zelda: It was Ness. He says that he has important news to tell everyone.

Kirby: I wonder what it could be?

Zelda: I have some important news of my own to tell everyone. Link spoke a few weeks ago!

Kirby: …Link doesn’t talk.

Samus: Zelda, we all know that Link doesn’t talk.

Yoshi: Delusional…

Zelda: Do you want another black eye?!

Yoshi: *grumble*

Zelda: And Link did speak! Go ahead, Link. Speak again!

Link: …?

Zelda: Ugh!

[ClaudeLv250]

Chapter 3: Waiting for Ness

*A green blur flashed through the Marketplace of Hyrule. Cuckoos flew in all directions, frantically trying to escape the “green demon”, dubbed by the frightened Hylians, that was wreaking havoc. A guard jumped into the path of the green demon, and was launched across the marketplace and into some crates at a crushing force that made the crates appear as if they had exploded. The green demon began to spin in place at rapid speeds, creating a small tornado which eventually detached itself and spun around the marketplace, picking up all debris and people in it’s way. Captain Falcon walked onto the scene of chaos and destruction. He couldn’t believe how much destruction the Bluer Falcon was causing. Inside of the Bluer Falcon, Young Link was enjoying the pressing of random buttons as each one proved to be entertaining. A particularly shiny button with the picture of a landmine caught Young Link’s attention. He pressed the button as hard as he could, releasing several mines from the rear of the vehicle.*

C.Falcon: My mines! Do you know how much I paid for those?!

*Another button caught Young Link’s attention. A yellow button marked with a “T” that looked like it was in motion. What could this button possibly do? Young Link didn’t hesitate to push the button. The Bluer Falcon made a small high-pitched noise. Nothing else happened. Young Link started to get bored and continued pushing the button, not knowing that the process of Turbo Speed was just beginning. The Bluer Falcon shot off at blinding speeds with a flash of light that lit the entire marketplace. The force of the speed was so strong that Young Link felt glued onto the seat, and everything outside of the glass looked like a blur. Captain Falcon felt a quick blast of wind and turned around to find the Bluer Falcon already halfway back to Hyrule castle. The landmines set earlier had detonated, setting a nearby tree ablaze. The tree stumbled over onto a store, setting it ablaze aswell. Falcon quickly fled the scene as the tornado created earlier picked up some of the flames and became a blazing tornado of fire that was blindly spinning around the almost completely destroyed marketplace. This was far worse than what Gannondorf could have done. Young Link couldn’t control the speeding Bluer Falcon. He had no choice but to turn off the ignition. When he did, the car came to an instant stop, almost throwing Young Link through the glass. He opened the door to find himself back in the courtyard of Hyrule castle. Falcon ran into the courtyard, and sighed in relief knowing that his Bluer Falcon wasn’t scratched. A guard entered the courtyard and dashed straight to Zelda.*

Guard: Princess! A Green Demon has attacked and destroyed the Marketplace. It has been reduced to burning ruins!

Zelda: Recruit as many guards as you can find and put the fires out! Bring all of the injured and wounded that you find back to the castle for treatment.

Guard: And the Green Demon, Princess?

Zelda: (eyeing Young Link) I have that under control…now hurry and recruit the guards!

Guard: Yes ma’am! *Runs into the castle*

Y.Link: I didn’t do nothin’!

Zelda: Yes you did! You stole Falcon’s car and you created chaos in the Marketplace! Do you know how much it’s going to cost to fix all of the damages?! Go to your room in the castle!

Y.Link: You’re not my mother!

Zelda: I’m glad that I’m not! You are the spawn of Gannondorf!

Y.Link: And…you look like Gannondorf!

*Link began to turn a bright shade of pink. He was embarrassed by his younger self’s actions.*

Marth: Enough of the bickering! Young Link, go play with your boomerang. Princess Zelda, sit down and calm your nerves.

*Young Link ran off, throwing his boomerang in random directions, hitting the back of random heads. Zelda carefully sat on a rock. Marth offered Zelda one of the sandwiches from earlier. Everyone else began to converse with each other.*

Marth: I managed to grab two sandwiches when the stampede had approached the tray.

Zelda: Thank you, Marth…you’re not mad at me?

Marth: I was disappointed that you would believe such malignant sayings about me but I realized that there was no one to blame but your friend with the odd name.

Yoshi: You are the one with the odd name!

Zelda: Are you sure you aren’t flirting with me?

Marth: If I were trying to court you, you would know it.

Kirby: I just remembered! I have good news! I got a letter from Luigi a week ago. He is on a remote island with someone named Daisy! They are living happy lives away from Mario and Peach!

Yoshi: Speak of the devil…

C.Falcon: Devil? Who was speaking about a devil?

Yoshi: Look up, Falcon.

*In the sky was a blimp. It wasn’t very large, but it had enough room for three people. The design of the blimp was similar to the one Luigi destroyed. The blimp stopped, and began to land in the castle courtyard.*

Samus: Did you invite THEM?

Zelda: No, I didn’t. I wonder how they found out…

*The sound of whipping came from the blimp. The door opened and Toad fell onto his stomach, while constantly being whipped by Peach. She eventually stopped as she took note of some unfamiliar faces. She walked off of the blimp, followed by Mario. Zelda frowned. The last thing she needed was to have more conflicts, especially from those two.*

Peach: Zelda…your little marketplace is on fire. We all know that if I ordered a marketplace to be built near my castle, I would take care of it.

Zelda: No one in his or her right mind would start a business at your marketplace.

C.Falcon: Where are you people hearing this?! I can’t believe that everyone has a right and left mind! I just DON’T believe it!

Yoshi: Falcon, it’s obvious that you DON’T have a mind.

C.Falcon: What does that mean?

Peach: I will build a prosperous marketplace that will be way better than your pathetic marketplace and mine won’t burn down into ruins!

Marth: *ahem* I believe that we have not met. I am Prince Marth.

Peach: Oh…I am Princess Peach.

*Roy’s ears seemed to tingle. Once again, Marth had introduced himself to the women first, and Roy sensed it from the other side of the courtyard. One woman had fallen for Marth and Roy wasn’t going to let it happen again! He charged over to where Marth and Peach were standing, and purposely pushed Marth out of the way. He turned to Peach, and put on one of his most charming smiles.*

Roy: Hey, there. I’m Roy…the best swordsman in all of Nintendo.

Peach: Hey…you’re kinda cute.

Roy: < Yes! > How about we get to know each other a little better.

*Roy held out his hand and Peach took it. They walked to another area in the courtyard. Mario stood in his same spot, completely baffled by what just happened. Why was Peach walking with this man?*

Mario: Who is that-a man?!

Zelda: That’s just Roy.

Mario: Who does he think-a he is?!

Marth: The best swordsman in all of Nintendo.

Mario: I don’t-a need-a any of you’re jokes!

*Mario stomped off in a rage.*

Marth: That is the Superstar of Nintendo?

Zelda: Unfortunately, yes. *Laugh* Hmm…I wonder where Ness is. He should have been here by now…

*An argument erupted between Mario and Roy. They were about to reach for each other’s throats. All eyes had turned to them.*

Mario: How dare you disrespect-a the better mascot-a of Nintendo!

Roy: Keep talking and I’ll knock some weight off of you!

Mario: Try it-a!

Peach: Shut up, Mario! If I want to get to know Roy better, I can!

Mario: But-a Peach!

Peach: Go do something and leave us alone!

Mario: *Whimper*

Peach: He won’t bother us anymore…so where were we?

Roy: I was about to tell you how I kicked Marth’s arse in a little bout we had.

Peach: Ugh…

Roy: What? I didn’t kick his arse that badly!

Peach: My head…pounding…

Roy: Er?

Peach: …

Roy: Are you okay?

*Peach pushes Roy to the ground in an outraged manner. She hops on top of him.*

Roy: Aren’t we moving a little too fast? *Sweatdrop*

Peach: Who are you and where is Fox?!

Roy: I told you; I’m Roy, the best swordsman in all of Nintendo. Don’t tell me that you have a short-term memory.

Peach: Don’t play games with me! Where is Fox?!

Roy: WHO is Fox is a better question. Unless you are looking for a fox…I doubt that you’d find one in this courtyard.

Peach: I’m not laughing! You are going to tell me where Fox is NOW!

Roy: I DON’T KNOW, DAMMIT!

Peach: Er…ugh…my head.

Roy: Oooooookay. *Sweatdrop*

Peach: Huh? Why are we on the ground?

Roy: You knocked me down, jumped on top of me and demanded to know who I was and where “Fox” was.

Peach: What? Why would I want to know where that flee-ridden animal has been?

Roy: How should I know!

Peach: You’re lying! Strange…suddenly…I feel exhausted. I think I’ll sit here and regain some strength.

Roy: You…go do that.

*Roy slowly backs away from Peach and bumps into Yoshi.*

Yoshi: WATCH WHERE YOU ARE GOING, DAMMIT!

Roy: Not in such a good mood after that black eye, are we? *Roy leans over to get a closer look at the black eye* Ew…it’s all swollen and-

Yoshi: SHUT UP!

Roy: Oh…hey. You know the women here better than I do. I want the scoop on each one! Tell me everything about Peach…I thought everything was fine with her until she went freakin’ psycho on me!

Yoshi: She…is a psycho whore. She is a stuck up biznitch but when she changes…

Roy: Yeah?

Yoshi: She turns into this crazy whore who chases Fox everywhere.

Roy: Er…well I guess I already found that out. What about Zelda? She may still have a thing for Marth but I can easily sway her over to me. So…are there any secrets about her that I should know first?

Yoshi: There is a lot wrong with Zelda!

Roy: Well…I figured that a woman that can hit that hard must have something wrong with her! *Laugh*

Yoshi: …that was uncalled for. Fine. You can find out about the women yourself.

Roy: Okay! Sorry! What she did to you was mean and wrong! I feel your pain! Be str-

Yoshi: SHUT UP!

Roy: You are cranky when you have a black eye.

Yoshi: I am going to ignore that comment and give you a quick, straight answer about Zelda’s secrets: Her breasts are artificial and she has no gender.

Roy: WHAT?!

Yoshi: Sad, but true.

Roy: You’re kidding, right?!

Yoshi: Nope.

Roy: Whoa…poor Marth. Doesn’t know that a…thing…was interested in him. I’m not even going to ask about the armored woman…if that is a woman.

Yoshi: That’s a woman all right…she’s taken anyway.

Roy: Taken by who?

Yoshi: Captain Falcon.

Roy: The buffoon?

Yoshi: Yup…and it seem like he is up to something else…

*Captain Falcon was rummaging through the inside of the Bluer Falcon. Everyone thought that he was checking to make sure that Young Link hadn’t destroyed anything.*

C.Falcon: Where is it…

Y.Link: Cool!

*Two Arwings over the courtyard. They eventually turned around and began to land in the courtyard.*

Zelda: That’s funny…I didn’t invite them either.

*The hatch to both Arwings opened. Fox and the vulpine known as Iris climbed out of the first arwing, and Falco came out of the other.*

Kirby: Oh…it’s her again.

Zelda: And who would that be?

Kirby: You’ll see…

Fox: *Moan*

Iris: Oh, Fox! Come on! I want to meet them!

Fox: I don’t see why you dragged me here.

Iris: You are so anti-social with these people! You are all big Nintendo mascots! You should meet with them more often!

Fox: I have a bad history with these people.

Iris: I think they would want to make up for the bad history.

Falco: Well I don’t see why I have to come!

Iris: You are in the Smash Brothers game too! You should at least get to know these people better!

Falco: Why should I get to know them? Kicking everyone’s arses in battles will be easier if I don’t know them.

Fox: Everyone?

Falco: Yeah, that includes you too.

Fox: You want to get hurt…

Zelda: Well, Hello.

Iris: Hi! I’m Iris.

Zelda: I am Princess Zelda.

*Everyone had crowded around to meet Iris. As Kirby made his way towards the crowd, Captain Falcon, who was hiding something behind his back, stopped him.*

Kirby: What? < Don’t make me mad. >

C.Falcon: I know we haven’t gotten along in the past…but I want to make up for it with a present!

*Captain Falcon held an M tomato in his hands.*

Kirby: Whoa! Thanks!

*Kirby snatched the M tomato right out of Falcon’s hand and took a big bite out of the back of the tomato. He chewed happily until he realized something about the taste.*

Kirby: This…isn’t a fresh tomato! This tomato is rotten!

*Kirby inspected the tomato to find fresh, black paint on it forming an “N” instead of an M. Captain Falcon smiled innocently. Kirby growled and turned a deep red. He hurled what was left of the tomato into Falcon’s face and stomped off…*

Iris: He did that?!

Samus: Yes…he tried to blow Kirby to pieces with a shotgun.

Iris: He said that he did some mean things in the past…but he never went into detail.

Peach: He’s done worse…he called me…

Iris: Called you what?

Peach: He called me…a tramp!

Iris: *gasp* A tramp?!

Marth: A tramp?

Roy: A tramp?

Yoshi: No way! Not a tramp!?

Link: A tramp?

Zelda: LOOK! HE SPOKE AGAIN!

Toad: Tramp?

C.Falcon: I like cars.

Falco: A tramp?

Kirby: …tramp… *growl*

Mario: A tramp-a?!

Samus: Why are half of you acting shocked when you already knew this? He calls her a tramp as often as he calls me a wench.

Iris: Wench?

Peach: A wench?

Link: A wench?

Zelda: AM I THE ONLY ONE HEARING HIM TALK?!

Yoshi: A wench? It just can’t be!

Roy: Wench?

Marth: A wench?

C.Falcon: I like driving my car.

Falco: A wench?

Mario: A wench-a?

Kirby: I STILL don’t know what a wench is!

Toad: A wench?

Samus: Stop it!

*A blinding flash erupted in the courtyard and Ness appeared, slightly charred,*

Ness: Er…hi!

Zelda: It’s Ness, he teleported!

Peach: He teleported?

Marth: He teleported?

Roy: He teleported?

Link: He teleported?

Zelda: HE KEEPS SPEAKING!!!

Fox: He teleported?

Kirby: He teleported?

C.Falcon: My car moves very fast!

Yoshi: I can’t believe it! He teleported!

Iris: He teleported?

Mario: He tele-

Samus: SHUT UP!

Zelda: I can’t believe that no one heard him!

C.Falcon: Heard who?

Zelda: Link! He spoke three times!

C.Falcon: Even I’m not going to fall for that.

Ness: Well, hi again.

Zelda: What took you so long?

Ness: Tracy was making the layout for an Escargo Express website that she making…it got deleted. She thought I deleted it and it took me awhile to convince my mother that I didn’t do it.

Zelda: Oh…well what is the news you wanted to tell everyone?

*Ness was beginning to tell everyone he news about the two forbidden amulets…but what no one knew was that they were being spied on…*

To Be continued...

After a long vacation, it returns!

Chapter 4: Decisions and the Search

Samus: Amulets?

Ness: That’s what it said.

Peach: I want one! I bet it’s so pretty…

Zelda: So the Amulet of Light is right here in Hyrule and the Amulet of Darkness is on Zebes.

Ness: So what are we going to do about it?

Samus: Nothing

Ness: What?!

Samus: I’ve scaled up and down Zebes and have yet to find anything that would resemble an Amulet of Darkness. Link has been throughout Hyrule many times and Zelda pretty much knows the land by heart. The amulets are well hidden. Looking for them would only cause trouble.

Roy: Who knows if they are safe where they are. I say we go look for them!

Y.Link: Yeah! Let’s look for them!

Kirby: I don’t know…

*The debate of whether to look for the amulets or not was on. In a corner of he courtyard stood some old bushes. They had not been trimmed for ages and seemed to be growing out in all directions. This was the perfect spot to lay low. The bushes been occupied by 3 villains who had been spying for a pretty long time. Gannondorf was peering through a pair of enhanced binoculars. Not only did they improve vision, they also had the ability to pick up sound. Behind him were Bowser and Mewtwo.*

Gdorf: These binoculars are great! Where did you get them?

Bowser: Stole them a long time ago…don’t remember. I use them to spy on Peach a lot.

Gdorf: …what is Fox doing there? And who is that woman with him?

Bowser: Why do you care?

Gdorf: We go out and get drinks every weekend. He didn’t show up for the past few weeks. And he doesn’t hang around these guys. Something’s wrong with Fox.

Bowser: He went soft. Face it.

Gdorf: No he didn’t!

Mewtwo: Shut up! Someone is coming.

*After being completely ignored in the debate of whether or not to go look for the amulets, Young Link was a little angry and felt deprived of attention. To get the attention he desired, he thought he make a little bit of fireworks. He saw the old bushes in the corner that seemed undisturbed. He quickly walked over to them and pulled a bomb out from thin air. He smirked as he lit the bomb and placed it in front of the bushes. He then walked away, whistling.*

Gdorf: That little brat!

Mewtwo: I’ll handle this.

*With a simple thought, Mewtwo raised the bomb into the air and hurled it into Young Link. The boy looked stupefied until he realized that he had a bomb on him. He didn’t have time to react before it blew up, sending him flying through the air. Young Link’s scream echoed across the courtyard but not many noticed it because they were still in the heat of the debate.*

Gdorf: Look at him fly through the air!

Mewtwo: Pay attention to the discussion. Did they say anything else about the amulets?

Gdorf: …no. They are still trying to decide on if they should look for them or not.

Mewtwo: Fools…

*A slightly charred Young Link limped back into the courtyard of the castle. No one had noticed him when he unwillingly left nor did they notice his re-entry now. He limped back over to the bushes. Something was wrong about those bushes…Young Link unleashed an onslaught of bombs and hurled them all at the bushes. Three figures had escaped the blast from the bombs and the booming caught everyone’s attention.*

Peach: *Gasp*

Bowser: Looks like we are discovered…

Y.Link: So that’s what was behind those bushes!

Samus: …they know about the amulets!

Bowser: That’s right! And we will take BOTH amulets for ourselves!

Gdorf: And we’ll destroy anyone that gets in our way!

Roy: Wanna bet? *Unsheathes sword* < I hope this is getting the ladies’ attention! >

Mewtwo: You pathetic creature…to even challenge someone of my stature.

Roy: You won’t be calling me pathetic when my sword cuts your head off you bastard!!

Marth: Roy now is not the time to explode into a rage. We know nothing of this…creature.

Mewtwo: Fools! I’d destroy you all in a second!

Bowser: …shouldn’t we be getting the amulets rather than challenging them?

Mewtwo: Yes…I was getting carried away with the thought of destroying them.

Gdorf: Well it’s time for us to split up…hah! I can feel the power of the amulets already!

Bowser: Once again, I cannot get what I want right now…but when I find those amulets, you’ll be mine, Peach…

Y.Link: Wait! You’ll pay for throwing my own bomb back at me!

Mewtwo: It’s best not to get on my bad side, boy.

*Young Link whipped out his bow and aimed a flaming arrow at Mewtwo. He launched the arrow straight towards the pokemon’s head…but it was easily deflected. Young Link felt himself being pulled towards Mewtwo, and in an instant, they both vanished.*

Link: !!!

Zelda: Young Link!

Bowser: Looks like our cue.

*Gannondorf took flight while an airship floated over the courtyard. A ladder rolled down towards Bowser and as he climbed up it, he winked to Peach. She cringed as Gannondorf and the airship had left.*

Roy: …well this officially sucks.

Kirby: Link doesn’t look too good…

Zelda: If Link’s younger self is killed…he’ll fade out of existence!

Samus: I don’t believe that Mewtwo has any intentions of killing Young Link…

Yoshi: Maybe he’s going to torture Young Link.

Link: !!!

Kirby: Whoa! Link, calm down! We don’t even know where Mewtwo went.

Samus: …if we get to the amulets before they do and use their powers…we can force them to tell us where they sent Young Link.

Iris: Ooo, an adventure!

Zelda: The Light Amulet is here in Hyrule and the Dark Amulet is on Zebes. They split up…so maybe we should too?

Marth: I favor that thought.

Samus: I’ll lead the group going to Zebes.

Zelda: Link and I will lead the group here in Hyrule.

Yoshi: So who’s going with who?

*Everyone huddled together as they began to decide who was going where. After a bit of discussing the matter, the groups were decided.*

Samus: It’s been decided…the following people going to Zebes with me are:

Peach (that would include Toad)
Yoshi
Fox
Iris
Kirby
Mario

Zelda: And those of you staying in Hyrule with Link and I are:

Marth
Roy
Falco
Captain Falcon

Samus: Some of you may have been grouped against your will. Tough luck, getting those amulets is more important than your preferences.

Kirby: Wait! Ness isn’t in a group.

Ness: I’m one of the few that can teleport long distances. I’ll be jumping back and forth between the two groups. You never know when my help may be needed.

C.Falcon: Don’t worry armored muffin, we may not be in the same group but I’m sure that you can take care of yourself!

Iris: Aw, isn’t that sweet?

Fox: Not really.

Samus: There is no time to waste. Everyone in my group, head to my ship!

*Samus’ ship slowly filled with occupants. No one but Iris seemed to be enthusiastic about the upcoming trip to Zebes. Maybe they just didn’t understand the chaos that could erupt in the Nintendo Universe if they didn’t keep those amulets from falling into the wrong hands.*

*****

*Mewtwo and Young Link appeared in a large room in Gannondorf’s castle. They were slightly floating in the air by Mewtwo’s power. He let Young Link drop to the floor with the thud, and remained floating. Young Link took in the surroundings and realized that he did not recognize this place. The older Link had been to Gannondorf’s castle but the Younger one had not.*

Y.Link: …where am I? Why did you bring me here? What do you want from me?

Mewtwo: What I want is for you to be quiet.

Y.Link: But-

Mewtwo: SILENCE!

Y.Link: …...you suck!

Mewtwo: Stupid creature! Don’t tempt me to use anymore of my power! Now stay quiet!

Y.Link: …

Mewtwo: As I thought, foolish boy…

Y.Link: …your mother!

*Mewtwo’s eyes started to glow red.*

Y.Link: …um…eh…your eyes are glowing red. You don’t smoke, do you?

Mewtwo: This is your last warning! Stay quiet or I will show you my power!

Y.Link: You’re not my mother or father! You can’t tell me to be quiet! I’m not afraid of you because you suck! You suck like there is no tomorrow! YOU SUCK YOU SUCK YOU SUCK YOU SU-

*In an instant, a fluorescent collar of dark energy formed around Young Link’s neck, preventing sound from being produced from his mouth. The boy tried screaming at the top of his lungs, but sound could not be produced no matter what he tried. Mewtwo laughed in his face.*

[ClaudeLv250]

Wow...Chapter 5 was the last new chapter I had posted for awhile. And it ends on a cliffhanger. Probably drove some people mad...

Chapter 5: The Search Begins...on Zebes

*Samus’ ship landed in a barren area on the surface of planet Zebes. The sky was caked with dark, ominous clouds. Samus almost had trouble navigating through them. The hatch of the ship opened and the occupants (Peach (that would include Toad) Yoshi, Fox, Iris, Kirby and Mario) slowly climbed out. Iris seemed to boom with life as she climbed out of the ship. The thought of going to a planet she’d never been to before had already excited her.*

Iris: Where are we going first?!

Samus: We have to make our way under the surface of Zebes.

Peach: We better do it quickly…it looks like it’s going to storm. Toad, why didn’t you bring my umbrella?!

Toad: I-I…I didn’t think it was going to rain!

Peach: You are lucky that I don’t feel like whipping you for your actions.

Toad: < Not that you would be able to do it… >

*In an instant, it began to rain.*

Peach: My hair and dress will be ruined! I’ve changed my mind! You are getting whipped…where is my whip? No! I left it behind!

Toad: < Hehehe… >

Mario: I’ll buy you another whip-a Peach if you leave that-a Roy boy alone-a!

Peach: Hmph!

Iris: Ah…isn’t this romantic?

Fox: We are on a fawking planet in the middle of nowhere and it’s raining chemicals that could be burning our fawking fur off! THAT is not romantic!

Iris: You know how to spoil the mood!

*Samus led everyone into the dark caverns of Crateria.*

Mario: It’s so dark-a! Can’t-a see a thing!

Iris: EEEEEIIIIIIIIAAAAAAHHHHH!!! *Grabs onto Fox*

Yoshi: What the hell are you screaming about?! My ears did not need to go through that. < Wait, I don’t have ears…? >

Iris: That...thing!

Peach: Toad! TOAD! Did you bring the flashlight?!

Toad: Yes… *grumble*

*Toad pulls a flashlight from out of his hat and shines it on the object by Iris’ leg.*

Iris: What is that thing?

Kirby: A dead goomba! Poor thing…

Samus: If there is a goomba here it means that...

Mario: Bowser is already here!

Samus: No more slacking! We have to find that amulet before Bowser does!

Yoshi: No problem! When someone who rocks as hard as I do is around, the job will always be done!

Samus: Why am I not surprised by that response?

Yoshi: Admit it! I rock and you know it!

Peach: Does anyone know where we’re going?

Samus: Yes, I believe that the amulet may be in the old section of Brinstar

Fox: Hurry up! I have a thirst for alcohol!

Iris: I thought I told you to cut down on the alcohol.

Fox: Heh… < Like I would. >

*****
...Somewhere in Zebes...

Bowser: Where the hell are we?!

Troopa: I think this place is called Norfair.

Bowser: That damn amulet better be down here! I brought some of my best goomba and troopa soldiers to Zebes and half of them are dead!

Troopa: The inhabitants of Zebes are deadlier than we thought.

Bowser: I wonder how Samus survived down here...

Goomba: Sir, I gotta go!

Bowser: Go? Go where?

Goomba: To the bathroom! I’m gonna burst if I don’t go soon!

*Bowser kicks the goomba into a boiling pit of lava.*

Troopa: That may also explain why half of the soldiers are dead. You keep killing them!

Bowser: Are you criticizing my actions?! You can boil too!

Troopa: No sir! I wasn’t criticizing you in any way!

Bowser: Good...

????: Fool!

Bowser: Wha?! Mewtwo, what are you doing here?! How did you get here?

Mewtwo: Teleportation. Your ignorance amazes me. Now why aren’t you looking for the amulet!?

Bowser: My troops are taking a break...

Mewtwo: Weaklings...

Bowser: Since you act so high and mighty, why don’t YOU find the amulet?

Mewtwo: If I knew exactly where it was, I’d have it by now you imbecile! I can sense it’s presence...it is a little further up in the planet!

Bowser: Dammit!

Troopa: We have to go back up?

Mewtwo: Now that you have a sense of direction, GO! *Teleports away*

Bowser: How I loathe him...when that amulet is in my possession, I won’t have to tolerate his arrogant attitude anymore.

*****
…Somewhere in Crateria…

Samus: A ferocious battle took place here...

*The floor of the area was littered with dead troopas and goombas.*

Iris: I think...I’m going to puke!

Yoshi: What? It’s not that bad!

Iris: Not for that! You don’t know what it’s like being pregnant!

Peach: Pregnant?!

Yoshi: Oh! I thought Fox had a thing for abnormally large women!

Fox: I thought you had a thing for women stronger than you.

Yoshi: *Growl* I was just kidding...

Fox: I wasn’t.

Peach: A baby?! Maybe I can throw a baby shower for you at my castle!

Iris: That would be great!

Peach: So, what’s the babies’ name? Is it a boy or girl? When are you due? Can I hold the baby when it’s born? What kind of present should I get?! Wouldn’t the baby look great in a dress like mine?! Wait, you didn’t tell me if the baby was a boy or girl yet!

Iris: Hey! You never gave me a chance to answer those questions!

Samus: Maybe we should discuss this matter after we get the amulet.

*There was a bubble door on the floor of the cavernous area. Samus opened it with a blast from her cannon. The door led to a vertical shaft. All traces of the cavern had disappeared. This new area appeared to be an old base of some sorts, that hadn’t been used in ages.*

Samus: Tourian...

Yoshi: What?

Samus: This use to be where the Mother Brain lurked...along with Metroids.

Kirby: Metroids are mean! I remember when one attacked me.

Iris: I want to see a Metroid!

Samus: This place was destroyed long ago...but there are metroids that survived and lurk around the many corners of Zebes. Be careful.

Yoshi: Uh...did anyone else notice the platforms that are scattered around? Do we have to make or way down by jumping between platforms?

Samus: Scared?

Yoshi: Me? Never! It’s just that...how is Iris going to get down?! Maybe we could take a detour or something?

Peach: I would give her my umbrella but Toad didn‘t bring it!

Iris: Fox could always carry me down. Right, Fox?

Fox: eh…well...

*A few minutes later, Samus, Mario, Kirby, and Yoshi had already made it to the bottom of the vertical corridor. Peach had slowly floated down to the bottom with the support of her dress, with Toad clinging on for his life. Fox was still making his way down while holding Iris tightly in his arms.*

Iris: Fox! Don’t land so hard!

Fox: I wouldn’t if you weren’t so damn heavy!

Iris: Well I am carrying our child in my womb!

Kirby: So Samus, where exactly are we going?

Samus: To Old Brinstar. There are many things that could be hidden there because of the shape it’s in after the destruction of Tourian...

*After a cramp ride on the elevator, the group had entered Old Brinstar.*

Samus: My scanners...are picking up some type of energy.

Iris: Ugh, I feel something dark.

Samus: The energy is evil...and it’s not normal evil, it’s concentrated... *Turns on X-ray visor* ...it’s in that wall!

Yoshi: Great...how are we going to get in the wall?

Samus: Power Bombs, of course. *Smile* I suggest that everyone stand back.

*Samus rolled into a ball and dropped a Power Bomb. She retreated behind metal structures with everyone else. The Power Bomb detonated, filling the area with blinding light. When the light dissipated, the destroyed wall revealed a corridor. In the middle of it was a pedestal with a dark purple amulet. The amulet seemed to have an unnatural glow to it. On the other side of the corridor was...*

Mario: Bowser!

Bowser: Wha? What are you doing he...Peeeeaaaacchh...

Troopa: Sir, concentrate on the current situation!

Bowser: *Cough* you’re right...

Samus: Move and die! *Aims cannon at Bowser*

Bowser: Well if any of you move, you can face my army of goombas! You could never take them all out!

Samus: Hello? Power Bombs. Super Missiles. Need I go on?

Bowser: Damn...Troopa, go to the amulet.

Troopa: But she’ll shoot ME!

Bowser: That’s the point! If she’s shooting at you, she won’t have time to shoot at me! Go, NOW!

*Troopa runs towards the amulet and stumbles back from the shockwave of a Power Beam shot and begins to scream like a little schoolgirl. In a flash, Bowser makes a leap for the Amulet of Darkness but is beaten by a pink flash. Kirby held the amulet in his flaps.*

Bowser: Damn you!

Kirby: Bowser, you’re so sneaky and devious. I knew you were going to try something like that so I moved first. *Kirby juggled the amulet*

Peach: He’s touching the amulet...

*Kirby noticed the frightened stares he was getting from both sides.*

Kirby: What’s wrong?

Samus: Kirby...we aren’t suppose to come in direct contact with the Amulet of Darkness, remember? It has side effects on those of the side of light...

*Kirby turned white with fear and stopped juggling the amulet.*

Bowser: Hahaha! You’re going to EXPLODE!

Samus: He’s not going to explode, that’s just one possible effect!

Bowser: It’s still possible that he’ll explode! Serves him right, stealing my amulet!

Samus: He’s NOT going to explode!

Bowser: He IS going to explode!

Fox: Am I the only one that’s notice that NOTHING’S HAPPENED YET!?

Yoshi: Maybe it’s a delayed reaction.

Iris: No, something’s happening!

*The amulet began to grow brighter than before. It covered Kirby completely and then released thick, dark purple smoke which rapidly filled the entire corridor preventing all from seeing anything...*

To be continued...

[ClaudeLv250]

And now...the long awaited chapter 6...the newest chapter in MONTHS! I present it to my fans...


Chapter 6: Cave of Light

*Marth, Roy, Falco, Ness, Link, and Captain Falcon all sat in Hyrule castle's courtyard, anxious to find the amulet. Captain Falcon had just hid the Bluer Falcon in some bushes because Zelda did not want panic to break out if anyone saw it.*

Marth: I'll see what is taking Princess Zelda so long... *leaves and enters Hyrule Castle*

Link: ...

C.Falcon: Soooo...Falco. It's been bothering me for awhile, but what kind of bird are you?

Falco: ...

*****

Woman: Princess! It was horrible! The green demon destroyed it all!

Zelda: Calm down...everything is being taken care of right now.

Marth: Princess, everyone is waiting to go find the amulet. They're getting quite impatient, and I believe the bird man is annoyed by Captain Falcon.

Zelda: But...I have to take care of things here.

Marth: These things can wait. If we don't look for that amulet soon, it may fall into the wrong hands and there will be problems much larger than this to worry about.

Zelda: You're right...let's go.

*****

*Marth and Zelda returned to the courtyard to find Roy trying his best to suppress laughter while Captain Falcon shouted random species of birds in hopes to answer his own question. Falco's wing was only inches away from his holster, inching even closer with each word Falcon shouted. Link sat on a rock, deep in thought, or at least trying to ignore Falcon. Ness was playing with his yo-yo.*

Zelda: Okay boys! It’s time to look for that amulet!

Falco: It's about time.

Ness: Do you know where the amulet is?

Zelda: Not just yet, but it'll only take a moment.

*Zelda held her hands together and closed her eyes. For a brief moment, the guys could have sworn that the wind abruptly changed direction. Zelda opened her eyes and smiled.*

Zelda: It's not too far from here!

Roy: What did you do?

Zelda: Being that I am magically gifted, I sensed for it. We're looking for the Amulet of Light, so all I had to look for was an area in Hyrule with high concentrations of Light energy.

C.Falcon: So where is it?

Zelda: It's somewhere near kakariko village.

Marth: Shall we take our horses?

Zelda: No, the village is only a short walk from here.

C.Falcon: What about my car?

Zelda: That should stay out of sight.

Falco: Wait...what happened to the Arwings?

Zelda: I cast a spell on them. They're invisible. Now let's go find that amulet!

*****

*Leaving the castle courtyard and heading on their way out, the group walked through the destroyed marketplace.*

C.Falcon: Wow, some things are still on fire.

Zelda: Damn...if I wasn't so worried about Young Link, I'd be furious with him.

Link: ...

Roy: I hope you know this is partly your fault, Captain Falcon.

C.Falcon: Wha?

Ness: You left the car unlocked. That's the only reason why Young Link was able to do this.

C.Falcon: I always leave my car unlocked! What if I lose my keys?

Marth: There is no point in having the keys if you do not plan on securing the vehicle with them!

C.Falcon: Sheesh! I'll lock the car next time!

*Unfortunately for Captain Falcon, not locking the car THIS time will cause him great misfortune in the near future...*

*****

*After a short walk through Hyrule Field, the group climbed the stairs to Kakariko Village.*

Ness: Wow! What a nice and homely village!

*The inhabitants noticed the newcomers as well as their Princess and Hero of Time entering the village. They all began to surround the group, cheering and applauding.*

C.Falcon: Wow, I didn't know that I was this popular!

Ness: They're cheering for Zelda and Link.

C.Falcon: Are you sure? They might have saved this place a few times, but I’ve won the F-Zero Grand Prix!

Ness: ...

Village Woman: What brings the Princess and Hero to the village today?

Zelda: We’re investigating Death Mountain. There’s nothing to be concerned about.

*Teenaged village girls started to surround and flirt with Link, Marth, and Roy. Most of them were frightened of Falco, too old for Ness, and appalled by Captain Falcon’s strange clothing to get near those three. Zelda walked towards the path leading to Death Mountain with a trail of young men following after her. She waved a hand and the men reluctantly dispatched while Falco, Captain Falcon, and Ness caught up with her.*

Zelda: C’mon, boys!

*The swordsmen managed to break through the crowd of women and ran towards Zelda. The sighed in disappointment until Roy told them that they would have to come back through the town later. The group of seven walked up the trail of Death Mountain. Zelda extended her arm and held her hand inches away from the rocky walls of Death Mountain as they walked.*

Roy: ...what are you doing?

Zelda: I can sense the amulet. It’s not far from here.

*She led the group while focusing on the amulet. They continued to walk up the trail for nearly a minute until she stopped abruptly, almost causing them to collide with her back.*

Zelda: It’s here.

Ness: ...where?

Zelda: In the wall. *points to a crack*

Link: ...

*Link pulled three lit bombs from seemingly thin air and planted them in front of the cracked wall. Everyone retreated from the bombs and waited for them to explode, exposing a tunnel leading into unknown depths of Death Mountain.*

Zelda: I’ve never known of this cave. That’s strange.

Falco: And we have to go in there?

C.Falcon: *looking in the cave* Looks pretty dark...

Marth: We must hurry. Those villainous beings will most likely follow our trail...and we must help Link’s younger self as well!

Speaking of Young Link...

*****

*Young Link sat on the room in Ganondorf’s castle. Mewtwo was on the other side of the room, floating in midair with his arms crossed and eyes closed, seemingly in deep thought. Young Link made a pointless effort to yell with the collar still preventing any sound to escape his throat. He wanted to do something to annoy the pompous Mewtwo. He found that he still had his Kokori Sword with him. He slowly slipped it out of its scabbard and threw it at Mewtwo. The blade stopped inches away from Mewtwo and began to circle him. Young Link cursed silently when he saw the aura of dark energy surrounding the blade.*

Mewtwo: Why do you continue to provoke me? Do you seek death? With a thought, I could tighten the collar around your neck and choke you to death with it!

Y.Link: ...

*Young Link looked unmoved by Mewtwo’s threat. It was one of the many he had heard for the few hours he had been stuck in Ganondorf’s castle. Mewtwo opened his eyes and the Kokori Sword shot back at Young Link and stuck into the wall. Thinking that it was his opportunity, Young Link grabbed the sword from the wall and attacked Mewtwo, hacking and slashing as Mewtwo either nimbly evaded or teleported completely from the child’s view. Mewtwo was pleased with himself until Young Link managed to scratch one of his legs. The boy found himself face down on the ground with no control over his body, then he was lifted into the air while his body was covered in an aura of dark energy.*

Mewtwo: I’ve lost my patience, child. I won’t destroy...I’ll just entertain myself.

Young Link: !!!

*Young Link’s eyes widened in horror and he mouthed ‘No’ in a fit as he tried to release himself from the dark energy. Ganondorf’s organ began to play an upbeat tune as Young Link’s body began to perform the Dutch dance in midair.*

Mewtwo: Dance, puppet! DANCE! Mwahahaha!

If Young Link was capable of screaming, he would have. Very loud, very long.

*****

*Zelda’s party walked through the dark Death Mountain cavern silently. They walked...and they walked...and then they walked some more...then they kept walking. Finally, they were walking, until...*

Ness: It’s getting too dark in here.

Zelda: I can remedy that!

*Zelda snapped her fingers and a small orb of light appeared in front of her. The light led the way further into the cavern. So they walked, with light now. They continued walking for a few more minutes, until...*

Falco: It’s too damn quiet! Someone say SOMETHING! ANYTHING!

C.Falcon: I like cars. Do you like cars? Because I like cars!

Falco: Ugh, nevermind! NEVERMIND!

C.Falcon: Did you know that I have a car? I can drive it too, ya know. I should-

Marth: SILENCE!!

C.Falcon: ...that’s a cruel track in a previous F-Zero Grand Prix, but nothing can stop me or my Bluer Falcon!

Roy: I think he was telling you to be quiet.

C.Falcon: Oh...

Zelda: Hey guys, I see light up ahead!

C.Falcon: Is it a car?!

Roy: No, stupid! That’s the amulet!

*The ground shook and a powerful shockwave knocked everyone off of their feet. There was a familiar laugh as Ganondorf flew through the cavern and towards the light. Link managed to clumsily throw his boomerang while on the ground but it missed Ganondorf by a mile and smacked into the cavern walls.*

*****

*Ganondorf flew into the small crude room. The Amulet of Light sat on a pedestal in the middle of the room, emitting light that traveled through the room and out into the cavern. Footsteps followed shortly after Ganondorf landed near the pedestal.*

Gdorf: Hahaha! It’s mine! Not yours! MINE!

C.Falcon: Well, you can have it because it’s not a car after all...

Gdorf: My pleasure *reaches for the amulet*

Zelda: WAIT!! You do know what will happen if you touch the amulet?

Gdorf: ...don’t play mind games with me, wench!

Marth: You certainly are not one to respect women!

Gdorf: I wasn’t talking to you, wench!

Marth: I AM NOT A WOMAN! That word DOES NOT apply to me!

Zelda: So do you know about the side effects from touching the amulet?!

Gdorf: Yes, I do. And there’s only a CHANCE that something will happen to me.

Ness: A 99.9 percent chance, Jeff told me.

Gdorf: You’re lying!

Roy: And to think that you were the fool sent of the three to get the amulet that would destroy you!

Gdorf: I’ll show you a fool!

Marth: Yes, you will. Touch the amulet. That is what your friends wanted, and that is what we want.

Ness: Are we so sure about that?

Roy: Yeah! Let him explode into millions of pieces!

Gdorf: < Damn, I’ve been set up! WE have no use for the amulet! Mewtwo just wants me out of the way so he can use the Amulet of Darkness and have all the power to himself! I won’t let that happen! >

Zelda: Have you made up your mind?

*Ganondorf looked around the room, and then a sadistic grin grew on his face. He pounded the ground with his fist, causing a shockwave to knock everyone off of their feet. He took flight and flew through the long passage of the cave that originally lead to the room.*

Roy: Ah...where’s he going?

Zelda: I think he realized his mistake.

Ness: What mistake was that?

Marth: Trust. Villains cannot trust each other because their own greed will cause them to plot each other’s own demise.

Falco: Let’s just get that stupid amulet before something else happens.

*Link went to reach for the amulet but was stopped by Zelda.*

Zelda: We shouldn’t touch it yet...it increases the power of anyone on the side of good. We don’t want to use that just yet...we might need it to save Young Link...

Roy: We can take it but we just can’t make direct contact with it.

*Link opened his pouched and scooped the amulet off of the pedestal with the Master Sword. The group trekked back through the long tunnel. From out of no where, Captain Falcon started mouthing off, once again, about cars.*

C.Falcon: I SWEAR I hear a car!

Zelda: There aren’t any cars in Hyrule except for yours.

C.Falcon: It has to be my car! It sounds exactly like the Bluer Falcon!

Roy: And who the heck would be driving the freakin’ thing?!

*They were only meters away from the entrance to the cave, but the engine of the Blue Falcon...er, Bluer Falcon, could be heard. As they exited the cave, they witnessed the futuristic vehicle racing up the path towards Death Mountain, and straight for them!*

Zelda: SCATTER!

*Zelda didn’t have to say it twice, as everyone ran for their lives up the trail to Death Mountain. The Bluer Falcon, however, stopped near the entrance to the cave. No one took a good look at the occupant of the vehicle, of course, because they were running for their lives. The mysterious being in the car took interest in only one of the fools running up the path and screaming maniacally. With a sadistic grin on its face, it zoomed at blinding speeds in the hijacked vehicle and ran over its intended target. The others stopped running and began to shout and throw objects at the still vehicle. The hatch opened and standing on the seat was the awkward body of Kirby. He laughed at his victim.*

Kirby: That’s one on my list that’s dead...scum.

*He completely ignored the gapes that came from behind him. He took one last look at the body and spit on it, then drove off, back down the trail leading away from Death Mountain. Zelda ran as fast as she could in her dress to the body, followed by the rest of her party.*

Zelda: Falcon! Wake up! CAPTAIN FALCON!

To be continued...

I just realized that this ended on a slight cliffhanger too. Oh well, cliffhangers are fun. And I've already finished half of chapter 7. Does this mean I'm returning to a steady pace with this? I hope so...

[Nikovich]

No! I just re-read the whole thing and in this chapter he was making me laugh the most out of the whole story! Damn you Kirby! Fox should have killed you!

[ClaudeLv250]

Believe it or not, I got another chapter out and it didn't take 9 months! Despite my recent Tales of Symphonia addiction, I still managed to finish this chapter. I was just writing and BAM, it was done. I realized that I wanted to stop it there. Also, this chapter is going to answer a lot of the big questions (What happened to Kirby, is CF dead or alive, etc).

You might also want to note theslight change in formatting. Its mostly THANKS TO FANFICTION.NET! Those bastards are disabling a lot of the fomatting, including the asteriks. I LIKE asteriks!

-----

Chapter 7: The Two Faces of Kirby

*Zelda shook the lifeless body of Captain Falcon until he stirred and murmured.*

C.Falcon: “I...I...like...cars??”

Zelda: “Are you okay?!”

C.Falcon: “I...he spit on me!”

Roy: “You were just run over with your own car and all you’re worried about is him spitting on you?!”

Falco: “He’s lucky he’s not dead.”

Ness: “The car hovers off of the ground a bit, so that explains why he wasn’t crushed to death.”

Zelda: “But...why would Kirby of all people do something like that? It doesn’t make sense.”

Falco: “I’m guessing he doesn’t like him...hell, even I don’t like him!”

*The sound of Samus’ ship echoed through the canyon trail as it flew overhead towards Hyrule Field. Samus didn’t particularly care for stealth at the moment, as what she had to report was urgent. Zelda’s party (with a limping Falcon) left the trial and crossed back through Kakariko without much notice since most of the villagers had gathered to discuss the UFO that briefly appeared in the sky. They arrived in Hyrule Field to find Samus’ ship hovering idly and most of the rest of Samus’ party waiting for them. Samus ran over to them.*

Samus: “Was he here?!”

Zelda: “Who?”

Samus: “Kirby! Did he come here?”

Roy: “Yeah, and he messed up Captain Falcon real good.”

Samus: “Damn...”

C.Falcon: “I’m okay, armored muffin...”

Marth: “What is going on? Why did he do that?”

*Samus explained the events of Zebes to everyone. From the time they landed on the surface, all the way up to the point where Kirby touched the Amulet of Darkness.*

Zelda: “So what happened when he touched it?”

Samus: “I think you should see for yourself...”

*Samus called for Kirby and he popped out of her ship, taking his time to walk over and stop by her side. Samus spoke before anyone managed to chew him out.*

Samus: “This is the result of the amulet...”

Roy: “What are you getting at?”

Samus: “The amulet split Kirby into two different beings. The one that attacked Falcon is what we now call Dark Kirby, and the one right here is Light Kirby.”

Marth: “And this is one of the many unpredictable effects of the amulet when touched by beings of opposite sides?”

Samus: “Pretty much...Dark Kirby possesses all of the dark qualities of Kirby’s emotions and thoughts, and Light Kirby has the light emotions and thoughts. But what’s even worse than the split is the fact that the Amulet of Darkness embedded itself into the back of Dark Kirby, and we don’t know where he is...”

Ness: “Man...we seriously need to figure out what to do...and I know exactly who to talk to!”

-----

*Bowser stomped through Ganondorf’s castle, pissed because he failed to get the Amulet of Darkness, with his lackey Troopa following behind him silently. He was thinking about what he would tell the others when his thoughts were cut short by Mewtwo’s laughter. He swung the door open and cringed at the sight he saw.*

Bowser: “My GOD Mewtwo, you’re a sick bastard! He’s only a CHILD! How can you do something like that?!”

*The Dutch dancing of Young Link stopped and Mewtwo dropped him to the floor. Young Link slumped, having lost all feeling in his legs over an hour ago.*

Mewtwo: “You ruin my fun. A few more minutes and I would have had him break dancing!”

Bowser: “How long did you have him doing that?”

Mewtwo: “Three hours and twenty five minutes. Now, enough talk! Do you have the amulet? I don’t sense it...”

Bowser: “Well...uh...you see...oh, look over there! Ganondorf’s here!”

Gdorf: “Mewtwo! I figured out what you were up to and I did NOT fall for your little trap!”

Mewtwo: “What are you babbling about, imbecile?”

Gdorf: “YOU are the imbecile, because your plan didn’t work! To think that you tried to make me touch that Amulet of Light, KNOWING that something would happen to me if I did!”

Mewtwo: “...FOOL! The point wasn’t for you to touch the amulet! As long as you don’t make direct contact, it won’t affect you.”

Gdorf: “We can’t use the amulet regardless of having it or not!”

Mewtwo: “But the point was for them NOT to have it! Now they have a powerful weapon they can use against us because you were too foolish to take it!”

Gdorf: “Oh...”

Mewtwo: (Glaring at Bowser) “And what’s your excuse?!”

Bowser: “Well...uh...you see...there was this HUGE war on Zebes after you left, and everyone was fighting! And I was taking on five of those goody-goodies all by myself when Kirby stole the amulet! Because of the war, I lost half of my troops...”

Troopa: “What? That’s not what happened! YOU killed half of the troops, and there wasn’t even a wa...!”

*Troopa soon found his head colliding with Bowser’s fist. Ganondorf couldn’t help but chuckle at Bowser’s exposed lie and Mewtwo continued glaring at him.*

Mewtwo: “So they have BOTH amulets?”

Bowser: “Well...after Kirby grabbed the amulet, I left right away. There was a lot of smoke and the side effects probably killed him though...”

Mewtwo: “That’s not good enough! They have BOTH amulets! We have none! You Neanderthals failed! Do you know what-“

*Thump*

*Everyone’s attention was brought to Young Link. He stumbled over and fell right on his face, still not regaining full use of his legs just yet.*

Gdorf: “Why haven’t we killed him yet? Kill him and the future Link dies too! That’s two Links with one stone!”

Mewtwo: “I have a better idea!”

Bowser: “Not more dancing...”

Gdorf: “Dancing?”

Mewtwo: “No, we’ll use the child and demand for both amulets as ransom. Knowing those fools, they value his life more than the power they possess. Once we have those amulets, we shall sweep over the Nintendo-verse, conquering each land one at a time! Everyone will bow to us, and worship us daily...”

*Bowser and Ganondorf tended to ignore Mewtwo whenever he went into one of his long monologues about conquering the Nintendo-verse and what life would be like once they did it.*

Bowser: (whisper)

Gdorf: “He WHAT? That’s sick!”

Bowser: (whisper)

Gdorf: “Three hours and twenty five minutes?! And I only wanted to kill the poor child, not torture him...”

Bowser: (whisper)

Gdorf: “He was really going to do that afterwards?”

*Bowser nods.*

Mewtwo: “What are you two talking about?”

Bowser: “Nothing...”

Mewtwo: “I’m going to inform our enemies of the ransom myself, as either of you two idiots would most likely screw that up.” (grabs Young Link and teleports away)

Gdorf: “...as soon as we get that Amulet of Darkness, we’re gonna kill him, right?”

Bowser: “Right!”

Gdorf: “Good!”

-----

*Samus ship was still empty. Everyone had been sitting around, waiting once again for Ness to return. There were a few conversations, but most of them were about Kirby. Or Light Kirby. Or Dark Kirby.*

Falco: “The big-headed kid is taking too long.”

Samus: “Look, there probably isn’t an easy solution to our...double Kirby problem.”

Fox: “Am I the only one that’s not giving a damn right now?”

Iris: “Fox! Your friend is in trouble.”

Fox: “He’s not my friend.”

Iris: “I bet he would help you if you were in trouble. And we’ve got a baby on the way. I know you’ve changed a lot since the second Lylat War...and since we met, you’ve been changing again, for the better. The way you use to be; the Fox McCloud everyone knows and loves.”

Light Kirby: “That’s right Fox! You’re a hero!”

Fox: “Be quiet, no one was talking to you.”

L.Kirby: “Sorry...”

Fox: “Well it’s not like him being split like this is going to hurt anybody.”

*Captain Falcon moans in pain.*

Fox: “Well...besides him.”

Samus: “The truth is that Dark Kirby IS a threat, especially with that Amulet of Darkness. He has the mind of a villain and the power of the amulet to succeed. If he does decide to do something large scale, no world may be safe.”

Fox: “Alright already, I get the damn point. He’s evil and we have to stop him.”

Roy: “Well, since we’re on the subject of Kirby, how do we tell them apart if we’re not together? They look exactly alike.”

Samus: “Dark Kirby had that amulet stuck in his back pretty good, so you should look for that. Also, Dark Kirby is a shade darker and Light Kirby is a shade lighter than normal Kirby.”

Marth: “Yes...I see the lighter tone of this Kirby.”

Zelda: “He’s back!”

*A slightly charred boy had come running to them. Through closer inspection, they realized that it was Ness.*

Zelda: “What did he say?”

Ness: “Well, Jeff did some more digging, and he came up with a lot of theories. He said that when the Amulet touches someone of the wrong side, it either tries to solve or destroy the problem. Its solution for Kirby was to split him into a being that could accept the power of Darkness.”

Marth: “And how do we fix this problem?”

Ness: “He said something about opposites attracting. Light Kirby has to have the Amulet of Light and be within ten feet of Dark Kirby. The Amulets will react and pull them together. The collision of powers will reform Kirby.”

Yoshi: “That sounds a little too easy.”

Peach: “Well I don’t want to sit here all day with you people! Since we have one amulet and know where the other is, we can go get it and-”

Mewtwo: “Give them to me!”

*Mewtwo hovered in the air, holding Young Link in one hand by the tunic.*

Link: “!!!”

Zelda: “Mewtwo! Give Young Link back now or...!”

Mewtwo: “Or what?”

*Samus raised her arm cannon and Link unsheathed the Master Sword as the other smashers prepared for battle. Mewtwo made the gesture of closing his fist with his free hand and the collar of dark energy around Young Link’s neck began to tighten.*

Mewtwo: “Move again and I’ll crush his neck until his head rolls off.”

Marth: “Why are you doing this? What is it that you want?”

Mewtwo: “I want the amulets. Get them both to me by the end of the day or you can look forward to finding the dead body of this child in the morning.”

Zelda: “But we don’t have both amulets! Kirby has the other!”

Mewtwo: “...he’s right there.”

Roy: “Well it’s not exactly this Kirby that has it, but the other one.”

Mewtwo: “Stop this nonsense and feeble excuses! You WILL give me the amulets if you want the child to live another day.”

*Mewtwo teleported away as quickly as he came, taking Young Link along with him.*

L.Kirby: “What are we going to do? This is partially my fault after all.”

Zelda: “It’s not your fault. Those amulets should have never been made.”

L.Kirby: “But we don’t have both amulets, and Mewtwo’s going to kill Young Link if we don’t give them to him.”

Samus: “Then we’ll just have to go get the other one and fix you with your dark counterpart. We’ll succeed.”

L.Kirby: “You’re right; everything’s going to be fine!”

Fox: “Did you forget that we don’t know where he is?”

Samus: “Well, I think I have an idea. When we first saw Dark Kirby on Zebes, he said something about a hit list and Falcon was the first on it.” (Captain Falcon moans in pain.) “He came here and tried to take Falcon out.”

Roy: “So what does that mean? He’s going after people he doesn’t like?”

Samus: “Pretty much. To find him, we have to figure out who’s next on his list.”

Yoshi: “So who doesn’t he like almost as much as Falcon?”

Everyone: “...Pikachu!”

-----

*Dark Kirby cruised along the road in the hijacked Bluer Falcon. He had just passed the ‘Entering Saffron City Limits’ sign. On his way, he picked up a familiar passenger; the Pokemon and fighting colleague, Jigglypuff. At first, she didn’t care much for the usually blissful attitude of the pink puffball but she found herself strangely attracted to the new and darker attitude he carried with him. She didn’t know what he had planned but she knew that it was mischievous and she was one for causing some trouble herself.*

Jiggly: “Jigglypuff? Jiggly!”

D.Kirby: “Ugh...I really have to get you one of those translator collars.”

Jiggly: “Jiggly!”

*Having entered the city, Dark Kirby spots a pet shop across the street. He makes a flawless U-turn in the superior vehicle, sending cars careening into each other. After parking in front of the store, he hops out and enters it, leaving Jigglypuff by herself. An argument erupts, glass shatters, and Dark Kirby hops out with a cage for a pet. The store owner chases after him but only catches the dust cloud left behind by the Bluer Falcon. Driving down the city streets, Dark Kirby could see the puzzled look on Jigglypuff’s face.*

D.Kirby: “You’re probably wondering what this is for. Well, you’ll see when we pay a certain pokemon a visit.”

Jiggly: “Puff? Jiggly!”

D.Kirby: “We’re going to get that collar soon because this is getting ridiculous. Now, to find that rodent, we have to find his annoying master.”

Jiggly: “JIGGLY!”

*Jigglypuff pointed to an animated billboard about a tournament in Saffron Park. Dark Kirby’s sadistic grin returned.*

D.Kirby: “Wherever there’s a Pokemon Tournament, his master will always be there.”

To Be Continued...

-----

Now all I need to do is figure out how to execute chapter 8. But before I do that, I'll have to finish the 3rd chapter of NTSoM.

[Nikovich]

Jigglypuff & Evil Kirby forver.

[storm_the_castle]

I can imagine, quite easily, Young Link doing a Dutch dance.

[ClaudeLv250]

It happened when you thought it wasn't! An update after nearly a year and a poem. I really want to get back into a habit of updating daily and not anually. But I present to you the long awaited:

Chapter 8: ‘Hi, I’m evil and I like to torture things.’

*The Bluer Falcon stopped at the entrance to the park. The hovercraft received a few curious glances, mainly because the technology was decades ahead of the time, but also because a ‘Ditto’ was driving it.*

D.Kirby: “Jigglypuff, stay here. I’ll have to do this myself.”

Jiggly: “Jiggly!”

D.Kirby: “Uh...yeah...jiggly.” < “I really need to get that collar...” >

*Dark Kirby entered the park to find it crammed with battling trainers, too focused on their own battles to notice the wandering, master-less Ditto and the evil amulet rooted into his back. Dark Kirby scoped the area to find the familiar annoying trainer known as Ash Ketchum battling with his friend Misty. Dark Kirby approached Ash and tugged at his pant leg.*

Ash: “What? Can’t you see that I’m in the middle of a battle?”

D.Kirby: “Hi, I’m evil and I like to torture things.”

Ash: “Uh...okay, but I really need to win this battle.”

*Realizing that Ash wouldn’t cooperate, Dark Kirby was ready to move on to the next step: Violence. If Ash wouldn’t pay him enough attention to hand over Pikachu, he’d just have to crack his skull with his large wooden mallet. Pulling it out of thin air, he aimed for the back of Ash’s head. Just before striking, he was tackled by the pokemon he was looking for, with the collar around his neck.*

Pikachu: “Kirby, what are you doing?! And why are you here?”

D.Kirby: “I came for you.”

Pikachu: “What for? What do you w-”

*Thwack!*

*Pikachu was out like a light from the direct hit by the hammer. Dark Kirby looked back at Ash to find the Neanderthal completely oblivious to the events or the fact that his pokemon was just talking, then dragged the limp body out of Saffron Park. Jigglypuff became excited when she saw Dark Kirby’s return, but before she could utter her name, the collar was ripped from Pikachu’s neck and slapped around her midsection like a belt. Instead of her name, actual words came out of her mouth. While she was amazed at her new speaking ability, Dark Kirby grabbed the kennel from the Bluer Falcon and threw Pikachu’s body into it, then locked it. Pikachu awoke to find Kirby tying the kennel to the back of the Bluer Falcon.*

Pikachu: “Pika!”

D.Kirby: “Shut up.”

Jiggly: “What are we doing now?”

D.Kirby: “We’re going for another joy ride.”

Jiggly: “Really? Let’s go!”

-----

*Young Link cried silently (the collar, remember? No, the other one that Mewtwo made). His sobs echoed through the empty room. He wanted his life to end. He was stuck with the obnoxious Mewtwo and the amulets were being used for his ransom. He felt that by being alive, he was burdening everyone else. He even considered the option of killing himself, even though he would never go through with it.

But then he got a flash of his heroes. They would never be caught in a situation like this, and if they had been, they wouldn’t be sitting around crying about it. Young Link stood and wiped his tears. Mewtwo never bothered to take his weapons away because all of his attacks had been futile. But Young Link wasn’t going to take that cocky bastard out. No, he was going to escape from Ganondorf’s castle!*

----------

Falco: “So we’re goin’ all the way out here just because you have a hunch?”

Samus: “Do you have any better ideas?”

Falco: “Yeah. I say we don’t look for him at all!”

Samus: “Well you didn’t have to come! The last thing I want to hear is your complaining so if you feel the need to criticize, don’t!”

Falco: “Fine!”

Samus: “FINE!”

*There was an awkward silence to Samus’s ship besides Yoshi’s channel surfing on the television that was installed. Zelda didn’t want Falco to feel that the trip was pointless so she went to explain it to him again.*

Zelda: “You see Falco, we really need that amulet that Kirby...or the other Kirby, has in his back. Not only to save Young Link but also to save Kirby and turn him back to normal. If we don’t help him and he goes causing too much trouble...he might be dealt with.”

Falco: “...dealt with?”

Zelda: “Yes, it may sound ridiculous now but if he causes too much trouble and starts to damage things and hurt important people...he may be deleted.”

Roy: “That’s crazy talk! Kirby’s one of us! What would people say if he just stopped appearing in games?”

Samus: “Well, people would ask questions, but ultimately, nothing could be done if Kirby were deleted. But that’s only if the higher-ups decide that he’s more of a threat to the Nintendo-verse as a whole.”

Zelda: “If we can get Kirby back to normal and stop him before he makes a grave mistake, Nintendo executives might not even notice what little he’s been doing so far.”

Falco: “So why are we going all the way out to...Sapphire City?”

Samus: “We’re going to Saffron City because that’s where Pikachu is. With Kirby’s darker side split from a conscience, he may come to hate the things he’s previously disliked. He made an attempt on Falcon’s life and showed no regret. He sees nothing wrong with attacking the people he isn’t exactly fond of, and the only other being I can think of that he doesn’t like as much as Captain Falcon is Pikachu.”

Yoshi: “Well, Samus, it looks like your hunch was right.”

Samus: “What?”

*Yoshi points to the Television, which shows countless police cars chasing after the Bluer Falcon, and a female TV News Reporter giving updates on the situation.*

Yoshi: “I know, I rock. You can thank me later.”

Iris: “Turn up the volume!”

Reporter: “It was less than twenty minutes ago when a Ditto and a Jigglypuff began wreaking havoc on the streets of Saffron in an unidentified automobile. It is believed that the automobile is a new military weapon that was stolen. How or why these pokemon have it is unknown at this time. There also seems to be a kennel of some sorts attached to the back of the vehicle, and a pikachu is held captive inside.”

Iris: “That’s horrible!”

Marth: “Such a vile act.”

*The Bluer Falcon unloads a few mines onto the street, sending a few police cars flying threw the air! The police open fire on the Bluer Flacon.*

C.Falcon: “My CAR! They’re going to shoot it up!”

Zelda: “Shhhh!”

*Gun fire proved pointless as it ricocheted off of the Bluer Falcon’s armor. Finding firearms useless, the local authorities turned to using their pokemon – another bizarre characteristic of the Pokemon world. Various projectiles and attacks were launched at the speeding F-Zero machine from the pokemon as they were commanded by their trainers, but they proved to be just as ineffective as the gun fire.

However, the ground began to rumble as an Onyx, the large rock pokemon, snake-like in shape and size, burrowed out of the street and threatened to block the way of the Bluer Falcon. Jigglypuff began to get edgy when Dark Kirby pushed harder on the gas, threatening to collide with the Onyx. Dark Kirby pointed one of his flaps-for-arms, as if on cue, the hatch of the Bluer Falcon opened as a beam of dark energy shot from Dark Kirby’s flap and blew the Onyx apart. Pieces of rock rained from the sky.*

Yoshi: “Kirby couldn’t do that before.”

Samus: “Damn...he’s channeling the energy from the Amulet of Darkness and using it offensively. I wasn’t sure that he could do it, but now that he knows how...this will be a lot more difficult.”

Marth: “He is surely putting himself and those around him in danger by using that evil amulet.”

Yoshi: “Did ya figure that out before or after he blew up the Onyx?!”

Samus: “Yoshi, the sarcasm isn’t helping.”

L.Kirby: “This is all my fault...”

Samus: “That’s not helping either.”

L.Kirby: “I’m so lame.”

Samus: “Stop it! And don’t call yourself ‘lame’ again.”

L.Kirby: “But I am lame! If it weren’t for me, none of this would be happening...”

Zelda: “Kirby, at a time like this, we need your support and not self pity.”

L.Kirby: “O...okay.”

Samus: “I suggest that everyone hang on to something. We’re going after Kirby and it’s going to get dangerous.”

----------

*There was a satisfied smirk on Dark Kirby’s face as the Bluer Falcon cruised the streets of Saffron undisturbed. Just a few seconds on the gas had left whatever fools from Saffron City’s Police Department in the dust. Now he was enjoying the freedom, and thinking of what to do next. That was until a familiar voice echoed from the sky and twisted his smirk into a look of disgust.*

Samus: “Kirby, stop what you’re doing right now!”

Roy: “Do you think he’ll listen?”

Samus: “No, but I want to find out what he’ll respond with.”

*The hatch of the cockpit of the Bluer Falcon opened and the flap of Dark Kirby pointed at the ship. A streak of dark energy shot towards the starship at blinding speeds. The ship barely dodged the blast.*

Yoshi: “Yeah, because that’s the kind of response you’d definitely want to stick around to find out!”

*Samus retaliated, making the ship launch two low-charged blue spheres from its cannons towards the speeding Bluer Falcon. Dark Kirby evaded them with ease by quickly moving the vehicle to the left and then the right.*

C.Falcon: “Hey! Don’t blow up my car!”

Samus: “Falcon, stopping this dark incarnation of Kirby is a lot more important than what might happen to your car.”

C.Falcon: “Samus, how can you say something like that?!”

D.Kirby: (Growls) “We’re an open target on this street.”

Jiggly: “What now?”

D.Kirby: “Find a place where I can control the situation better.”

Samus: “I don’t think I can keep firing at him, there’re too many civilians and cars on the road, and Pikachu is in that kennel attached to the back.”

Yoshi: “Pikachu? Who cares about him? Shoot! SHOOT!”

*Yoshi hits some random buttons on the console, and a missile fires at the Bluer Falcon. Dark Kirby manages to elude it, but barely escapes the blast radius as pieces of the road are blown around. Samus pushes Yoshi away from the console.*

Samus: “This is off limits to you after that stunt!”

Yoshi: “Well no one else was doing anything!”

Samus: “Do you want another black eye?”

Yoshi: “...you’re cruel.”

Samus: “No, you’re cruel. If we destroy Dark Kirby then we’ll never be able to restore the two and get the normal Kirby back. Did you ever think of that?”

Yoshi: “No, but at least it’ll stop his rampage!”

Roy: “Hey, guys...he changed directions.”

Iris: “It looks like he’s going to...the mall!”

*The Bluer Falcon makes a sharp turn, bursting into the parking lot of Saffron City’s original mall, not surprisingly called Saffron Mall. Cars go careening out of the way to avoid a collision. The Bluer Falcon stops in front of the mall and the two occupants jump out.*

Jiggly: “But what about-”

D.Kirby: “Pikachu? He can stay; I’ll torture him some more another day.”

Jiggly: “Oh, no. Nobody cares about Pikachu. I meant the car.”

D.Kirby: “We don’t need it anymore. Besides, there’s almost no gas left in that thing anyway.”

*The duo run into the mall. Just as Samus is about to land the ship near the entrance an explosion echoes from inside. People flee from the mall hysterically, only to freak out even more as a starship from the sky lands in front of them. Samus begins to come up with a plan inside of the ship.*

Samus: “We all can’t go in there. Some of us should go inside, and the others should wait here just incase Kirby’s dark half decides to retreat.”

L.Kirby: “I’ll stay here so I don’t get in anyone’s way.”

Samus: “No, you definitely have to come. We have to use the Amulet of Light to merge you with your other half.”

*Link steps forward, with the Amulet of Light in a pouch.*

Samus: “You’re coming too?”

*Link nods.*

Iris: “I want to go!”

Fox: “You only want to go inside to shop.”

Iris: “True, but we should be buying things in preparation for this baby!”

Fox: “But you’re not that pregnant! You can wait until after this situation.”

Iris: “Hmph! I’ll wait, only this time. But when it comes to shopping, I CAN’T be stopped!”

Fox: “I know that too well...”

Roy: “I’ll go with you! I didn’t know Kirby for very long before this happened, but I’d like to help him out.” < That should impress some ladies! >

C.Falcon: “Armored Muffin, I’ll go anywhere you’ll go.”

Samus: “So I guess that’s everyone that’s going?”

Zelda: “I’ll stay here and check on Pikachu.”

Yoshi: “If that’s the case, then I’m definitely not staying here.”

Samus: “Then I suggest that we hurry before Dark Kirby gets a chance to do anything else!”

*Samus, Light Kirby, Link, Roy, Yoshi, and Captain Falcon leave the ship and run into the mall, while Zelda goes to free Pikachu. The mall is empty and eerily quiet inside. Dark Kirby’s voice echoes through the mall’s sound system.*

D.Kirby: “Now I have the upper hand. You’ve walked right into my territory, and I’m not letting you go!”

*The automatic glass doors shut and lock themselves. Samus laughs.*

Samus: “You’re going to have to do a lot more than that to keep us locked in here. A shot from the Power Beam could break any of the doors here.”

*Thick metal plating covers all the doors and exits, cutting off all light and covering the mall in complete darkness.*

Yoshi: “Dammit, Samus! It’s usually Falcon that says the stupid things that makes the situation worse!”

*Samus and Captain Falcon slap Yoshi.*

Yoshi: “Ow, hey! Doubling up on me like that!”

Samus: “You’re not making things any better.”

C.Falcon: “And I don’t say stupid things!”

*The mall lights flicker on and off and the arguing stops. The lights stay on.*

D.Kirby: “HEY! You’re supposed to be paying attention to ME! Not arguing with each other!”

Samus: “Then show yourself, coward, and put a stop to this nonsense.”

D.Kirby: “Sorry, but I’m not stopping anything until my weaker half is DEAD! I guessed your little plan and I won’t let you merge us back together! I like being free of him and I’ll kill anyone that tries to change that.”

*The lights go out again, leaving everyone in complete darkness while Dark Kirby gives his best evil laugh on the sound system.”

To be continued...

I already started chapter 9. The confrontation with Dark Kirby will happen next chapter, but even then, there's still the matter of Young Link and Mewtwo. The story is over halfway completed, and there's only a few more chapters to go...

[Nikovich]

Quote of the Week: Fox: "You're not that pregnant!"